Someone slap me out of my sleeping cycle. Seriously, I'm embarrassing myself! I don't know how I always manage to get into my nocturnal mode... maybe I was destined to be a night person. Forensic anthropologists can't be night people. Can they?

I did a bit of babysitting this evening... I'm an aunt for a whole week! My sister gets to do the lovely egg-baby thing, and she killed egg-baby numero uno in a matter of hours; she didn't even get out of school with it! Today she has #2, which I named Paris for her because she wanted to name it Hailie. Seriously... naming a "child" after Eminem's kid? She's been playing his and 50 cent's music entirely too much these days, I'm going to end up strangling her. Anyway, Miranda doesn't understand that Paris is an actual baby for the next seven days. She insisted on plopping it in a tissue-stuffed jar and putting the lid back on. I was like, "Miranda, you're suffocating her, babies need air, you idiot!" I also noticed her leaving said egg-baby alone in a room for extended periods of time. I pointed out to her that you "can't leave a baby alone like that, she can die of SIDS and it'll be your fault!"... ha, this is going to be a fun week. She acted like a lunatic when I informed her that Paris was a real baby and you have to treat her like one. And this 16 year-old wants to get pregnant? Geez.

Since I'm on the topic of Miranda, I was tidying up this evening and found a note that one of her old boyfriends wrote her a few days ago; I had to photocopy it cause this idiot jailbird actually sees the big picture! So here's a little life lesson in the words of an ex-boyfriend...
Miranda,
You remember clearly that I said I simply don't want to be in a relationship with you. That's the only answer I could have come up with, at the time. What I left out was: I don't want to be in a relationship, or have anything to do with you, because I don't want to get in trouble! Last night is the last night that you hang around with me. I don't want more to do with you. When you come around I'll leave. It's hard enough of being responsible for you when you have a dad to feed and shelter you. You even get stuff from him, good clothing, music, and such. He's doing good for you and you turn it down. If I had my age back (16), I would LOVE IT, fucking love it, that my family was together at the time with a dad who's getting me, not only what I need, but also what I want. You have it good. Don't take advantage of it because there are people (like me) who hasn't enjoyed what you have. You get what I'm saying, right?
Hey, I have to stop allowing you to hang around me. Please accept it and move on, leave me be. Live your own life without me. Your dad can provide you good.
Sorry,

He could definitely benefit from a few language/writing classes, but he's a fucking genius. And I bet it went in one ear and out the other. She still maintains that she broke up with him and she can't stand him anymore, but it's in her nature to lie. In fact, most of what she says... I reverse the statement to what is actually the truth. She's a bad seed I tell ya.

I'm wearing: Baby tee, stretchy flares, grey socks, flower slippers
I'm listening to: Lucky *Bif Naked*
I'm thinking: My hair's actually growing! Too bad it needs a good trim....