i wish i could forget yesterday.

the morning went normal, i went to college. i went home for lunch, but stopped by the post office to check the mail. there only one envelope, from upei. it was really thin, so i pretty much knew i wasn't accepted. i was actually kind of relieved because that meant i wouldn't have to write them and tell them i wouldn't be going (i'm going to st. thomas university). well, i opened it up, and i was accepted. it boosted my confidence a bit, cause i didn't think i'd get accepted to both places.

so, when i got home, i told my mother, and she turned into this pscyho bitch. she started telling me which university to go to, and that my opinion didn't matter. she started saying i shouldn't have applied to "500,000 universities" and who did i think i was for doing it in the first place. she started yelling at me, saying she should be able to say which university i should go to since she "paid all the fees". excuse me, she paid to have the applications sent in the mail. if she wants her $14 back, she can damn well have it back. i hate the way she is. she started yelling at me, making me feel like crap.

you know, i don't think i ever really had a moher. she never did make me feel great about anything i ever did. all i wanted was some support, and have her congratulate me for even getting into both universities. but not so.

i went back after lunch crying. i know this sounds immature, but i've had all my anger for her building up, and this just let it all out. she's one evil woman and i hope her drinking and smoking is going to catch up on her and give her lung cancer and liver failure. i know that's evil of me but maybe it'll finally get something into her head, cause all that ever goes through her head, all that ever has gone through her head is ME ME ME. i mean, if the right people knew what she did to me and my family over the years, she would undoubtedly be in jail. and sometimes, that's where i wish she was.

i went to college, and they had this party going on... soccer game, barbeque (no meat for me, thanks), and music and stuff. she came over to me and my friends, and tried to act all nice. and i snapped at her. so she left me alone for the rest of the afternoon. after school, i went with nicole and marilyn all over the place, and i helped her get her computer connected to the internet (yay, my first friend to actually have the internet!), and rented a movie. by 10:45 i was too tired to stay up any longer, and called my dad to pick me up. i live a two minute walk away from her place, but it was cold and raining and i was wearing sandals.

i slept in this morning, and since i haven't seen my mother for nearly 12 hours, i'm starting to feel normal again. i went to nicole's and marilyn's this morning, and marilyn put my hair up. which is a miracle cause the only thing my hair ever sees is shampoo and a brush. we went for tim hortom's and i had a bagel. there was a lawyer there that looked a lot like pacey from dawson's creek and the girls all but swooned. i think marilyn was close to drooling!

but yeah, that was my day, and all i want to do is forget it happened. i should get going though, cuase i have to write upei now, and tell them i don't need a place in residence, or a place in their university. it's going to make me feel so bad.

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